I’ve seen a bit of this going on lately.
Being real is opening your eyes to what is actually happening around you. Being real in a first world country for many people should be about being grateful for living in such an amazing country and not taking it for granted. Being real is being humble. Being real is looking after others. Being real is being considerate of the situation others find themselves in. Being real should be about more than just you and your opinion. Your opinion is your opinion, everyone is entitled to one, and no-ones opinion is necessarily more ‘real’ than anyone else’s. Being real is not just complaining about things and calling it realness. It’s not about putting people down and calling it real. Real doesn’t have to be controversial or combative, it can be inclusive, understanding and forgiving. It’s an exercise I have to practice daily, and it’s not always easy, finding a way to look for a positive rather than just point at the negative all the time. But you get energy where you give it, and if you are always looking at what is bad, you will always see the worst in everything. There is as much real in the good as there is in the bad, so let’s try and even the score. #RealTalk #BeReal #JBNProject “Make Sure you Take Time For Yourself”, “Don’t Burn Out”, “Don’t Let Life Pass You By”. These are things that I have been hearing from caring and concerned friends and family for 15 years now.
They mean well, and their thoughts have all the best intentions behind them, but it has made me think often about goals. My goals, the goals of others and how they affect the way we live our lives, the way we work, the way we play and even the way we rest. I have some very specific goals, and while I rarely spend time re-establishing them, I often take a moment to re-focus on them and make sure that I am not being distracted by excess noise, or unnecessary wants. The more specific your goal, and the more narrow your focus the easier it is to work on a path to achieving them. However most people say their goal is one thing… But what they mean is much, much more. For some examples, there are times when I have said that my goal is to be in very good physical shape. I’m sure that most of us have been there! If that was my only goal, it would be fairly simple, not easy, but simple to plan. It would require adequate exercise, nutrition, rest and in due course I would be in good physical shape. However, many times I have had the goal of being in good shape, but also, I didn’t want to be bored with my training, I didn’t want to be bored with my food, I wanted to still be able to eat chocolate and drink beer. At times my ego got in the way and I would want to lift more than was prescribed or overdo something and potentially injure myself! I’m not saying that you have to have laser focus at all times. It is possible to get into good shape while avoiding boredom with my exercise choices, and still eating chocolate and drinking beer….. But it takes much longer. It is the same with being an entrepreneur and athlete or even charitable work. If you have a singular goal… Then the fastest, most efficient path is to have as few conditions on it as possible. Each additional consideration adds time and takes energy away from your central purpose. There is a lot of talk about self-awareness currently, and this is one time where it comes in very handy. For instance, I know that I am capable of working 15 hour days for a long period of time. I also know many people that can’t! I have seen entrepreneurs that have business goals, but ‘Need Weekends, and holidays’. Buying shoes or going on holidays before paying bills, Or that put Instagram likes ahead of sales figures. If your end goal is to make more sales, sometimes you need to spend time on improved business process or spend less on yourself. If your end goal is to help the most number of people possible, sometimes you may need to spend time behind the scenes ensuring the longevity and sustainability of your operations so that you can fulfill your goals for years to come. If you have goals, remember that every other goal, and every other need adds time and takes energy away from your central purpose. The more focused you are, the more focused your results and faster you will get there. Remember – The quickest path between two points is a straight line. Personally I know that I don’t need to have holidays, or go out all the time to deal with long days of work. Not before my goals have been reached anyway. In the meantime I will make do with a coffee, or some reading to keep my mind fresh. Find your path with the least amount of distraction, regularly check in with yourself to make sure you are focused, and go out and achieve your full potential. Ever have a day when you just feel bad? When the afternoon hits, and for no good reason you just get down. I do. I don’t think anyone is immune. Unfortunately some of us don’t have the luxury of being able to descend into a pit of despair and self-pity and lie in bed for a week to think about it…. As much as we might like to from time to time! I learned this lesson at a young age, watching my single mother put aside all her own terrible days and get on with raising three kids, even though I am sure that she would have loved to disappear to a tropical Island at some point and deal with those shitty feelings properly. When you have no money and three active, growing and hungry kids, you do what you have to do. Now, myself, without being able to disappear from sight, with multiple businesses to run that are very busy and constantly growing. I have to look at ways to get out of the foul mood that for apparently no good reason, came over me this afternoon. Personally, I firmly believe that you are what you do. Not what you say you are, not what you intend to do, what you actually do. So I always start there, a quick audit of my own week will reveal that in fact, this week I have dropped the ball on a couple of things that bother me… (And what I should do to fix them).
Each week I could choose to be happy on the balance of these external factors…. But what happens if I end up with multiple days, weeks, months with more negative external energy!? I would, as many would, find it hard to keep going with the same enthusiasm, effectiveness and vigour after a while. To deal with the bad days, the bad feelings, the general feeling of dread that sometimes randomly rears its ugly head. I focus on the one thing I have control over. Me. I can control myself and what I can do. I know that I am so tied to my purpose and end goal, that the way to get out of the funk is to get the things done that need doing. To catch up on anything that is behind and build the space into my day tomorrow to get into the next round of tasks with a clear head. I am also aware that in order to achieve uncommon success, you need uncommon effort. It’s now 1am and I wanted to catch the moment. Because there is no reason to leave your good feelings in the hands of anyone else, any more than you should leave your bad feelings in the hands of anyone else. Look in the mirror. You just keep being you. Be honest with yourself, know that you are always doing what needs to be done on the path to your end goal. If you aren’t doing something, don’t make excuses, make amends. Make progress. Make goals and make yourself happy. Then all the nice words of encouragement are just an enormous bonus! I finished up a bunch of work, wrote down what I have to do for tomorrow and looked at my whiteboard that has my end game written in bold across the top. To create extraordinary positive change in the world by helping others make ordinary positive change. Now who wouldn’t feel better after that? We all have bad days. We are all in control of how we deal with them. Work out what works for you and take control of that, and remember… Just Be Nice.
Check the VLOG out here and let me know what you think, and Just Be Nice!
- Josh Reid Jones While helping non-profits run more efficiently, I talk to many individuals who are passionate about starting something themselves to help. People looking to make a difference by starting a new enterprise — the ‘Social Enterprise’. Too many of these individuals are starting their conversations with ‘Insert passion and purpose here’ followed by “Business is not my strong point”. With big hearts and a passionate drive to help, they are frustrated often at how hard it can be to get involved with other organisations that are already doing work. Bottom line. If business is not your strong point, you should not be starting a business. It doesn’t matter if your intentions are noble, a business needs to be run well independently of the cause that it is servicing. For instance, if you start a café that employs the less-fortunate and provides opportunities for training, engagement and employment for those that otherwise struggle with it, it will not do well if the coffee is terrible. It won’t do well if the food isn’t up to scratch, and it won’t do well if the service is no good. What these remarkable, generous and understanding people bring to the table however is exactly that. They bring understanding of particular difficulties, they bring relationships with those in need, or people going through tough times. They bring an ability to connect with those who need a connection. The real future of social enterprise, or social responsibility is the connection of these people with business people, people whose skills are business. The Just Be Nice Project is about connecting business with those who understand social responsibility. We need to let the business people grow enterprise with scale, and the socially responsible individuals need an avenue to grow and scale the positive impact they can have. A successful cafe may just employ those less fortunate, if we have people to provide wrap-around support services to make it easy for the business to be involved. It allows the cafe to participate in making someones life better, if allows the social entrepreneur to focus on looking after the human element and challenges that come through employing disengaged individuals. If you believe you can run a social enterprise… Run a business first. It is much easier to add social responsibility to a successful business with scale, than to find a way to create consistent revenue from good intentions. Social responsibility is a long game, long term consistency and scale is the key to enormous positive impact, not big ideas with poor execution. There are already plenty of organisations with mission statements and bold ideas that fall well short of the mark before they fade into insignificance. With a non-profit for every 385 people in Australia alone, we could surely solve a large portion of the worlds problems by being more collaborative, consistent and accountable. If you are a person with a big idea that is unsure how to execute, feel free to drop me a line to discuss how we can use your skills, in collaboration with another organisation to reach scale and achieve longevity and consistency in the field of social responsibility. Along the way we can reach more people, educate and inform those who are able to help and provide lasting impact across the globe. As always, Just Be Nice. JOSHREIDJONES.COM I was asked today if I believed that we were lacking empathy in society today?
I really don't. I believe that what we lack is understanding. There are so many examples of peoples empathy in everyday life. People are empathetic online every day. Every like for a video that tugs at the heart strings is an empathetic response, even though it typically doesn't actually achieve anything or help anyone. However, when we see a tragedy on a global scale, we also see an outpouring of empathetic action. In response to the 2004 Indian Ocean Tsunami, Australians alone donated in the realm of A$190 Million. That is a significant undertaking, and directly relates to the level of exposure and understanding that we, as a general public, had to the event. Understanding can come in a variety of ways. Firstly, you can understand an issue as a result of being personally exposed to it. In the case of the tsunami, you may have known someone who was killed, injured or affected seriously by the event. We see so many people become passionate about causes that they have been exposed to on a personal level because empathetic response is high when you have felt what you believe other people are feeling. It's not unusual to become passionate about issues that you have seen up close. Seeing as I would never wish for more personal exposure to tragedy on anyone, this is not what I would consider the best way to seek out an increase in your knowledge. Another way to understand an issue is to educate yourself. Seek out others who have had the unfortunate experience of disadvantage, illness or misfortune. Talk to people who are from different cultural and socioeconomic backgrounds. Talk to people of the opposite gender, different age groups, different levels of education, family structure and sexuality and bring up your general understanding of other peoples lives. If you cannot speak directly to these people, speak to people who deal with these people or groups. If you aren't inspired currently to do anything in particular, rather than look for causes to get involved with, look for knowledge and understanding of the challenges and difficulties faced by individuals, animals and the environment across the world and you will naturally be exposed to the areas towards which you will feel the most empathy. Bust myths, get good quality information, and no doubt at some point you will feel compelled to get involved. Once you have found your areas of empathy... Stay tuned and I will hopefully help you make good decisions about how best to make a difference. So at every opportunity you get this week, seek understanding. Empathy will soon follow. .- JRJ |
AuthorJosh Reid Jones - Founder of The Just Be Nice Project and Odin Sports Archives
June 2018
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